Hi everyone. I (22m) seem to be in a stump in my dating life, which is why I’m looking to strangers on the internet for advice.
In the past two weeks I have gone on two first dates with two different girls. Girl one (19f) was a really enjoyable girl to talk to. I met her on bumble. We went on a picnic date in the park (her idea). And we seemingly talked for hours. The park was next to my apartment so I invited her in for a quick drink of water before she left for the night. She accepted. We got a drink and I walked her to her car, and right before she left we kissed. The next day I asked her if she wanted to come over later in the week and watch a movie (as she said she was a huge fan of movies and wanted to show me some). She agrees. The day of the movie comes, she comes over, we watch the movie and she leaves. Nothing more than I kiss happened as I’m trying to be respectful and like I don’t want her to think that I’m using her for sex. That night she text me saying that she doesn’t want a relationship with me as ‘we don’t have enough in common’. Like bummer, but I told her thanks for letting me know that and wished her luck.
The second girl (21f) I met on hinge. She seemed very put together and I was very attracted to her. Since my schedule was a bit busy this week I asked if she would like a FaceTime date. The FaceTime date went okay with us talking but I felt I was carrying the conversation (which I’m okay with). I try and ask open ended questions to get a greater response but that wasn’t happening. All in all I did have an enjoyable time talking with her and I offered that we should hang out sometime this week as I would love to meet her in person. She agreed and said that would be fun. Then this morning she text me saying that she is not looking for a relationship right now. I’m like shucks, that sucks, and thanked her for being upfront about it.
In both of these cases I stated that I wanted a long term relationship and they both started off by saying the same thing. Both girls end up saying that I am fun to talk to and attractive but just not what they are looking for. Like it feels like we have a connection and all but I may be reading the room incorrectly.
I don’t really understand what I am doing wrong. Any advice would be welcomed as I’m sort of at a loss here